There's never been a bracelet this hardcore. Made from military-issue 550 paracord, Survival Straps ($18-$25) are bracelets designed to help you in an emergency. With 15 to 20' of cord used in each bracelet, you simply unravel it to instantly have a section of strong rope for any number of uses. (Just ask Bear how handy one of these things would be.) The Survival Straps come with a marine-grade stainless steel shackle (or an optional side-release plastic buckle) and are available in 30 different colors. Also available are lanyards, key fobs, watch straps, dog collars, and rifle slings. If you're unlucky enough to have to use your Survival Strap, just send it back to the company, along with your disaster story, and they'll braid it back to new for you, free of charge.
Yes, seriously. Made of hand-cast sterling silver, this Mustache Comb Necklace ($168) will keep you and your Lady Tickler looking good.