If you looked at the title and thought "Chillsner? Sounds kinda like pilsner." then you're on the right track. The Chillsner ($30) is a new beer-chilling gadget that promises to keep your drink cold from the first beer to the last. To use it, you simply throw it in the freezer, and once it's good and cold, crack open your beer and put it down inside. Thanks to openings in the top, you can drink straight through it, or use it to chill your beer as you pour it into your favorite mug. Either way, it sure beats watering down your suds with ice.
There's an old adage that says you should never drink alone. With the Sasquatch Cocktail Shaker ($50), that shouldn't be a problem. This massive 110 oz. shaker is made from food-grade stainless steel, stands over 15" tall, and features a built-in strainer. Considering that 110 oz. is enough to make oversized drinks for over ten people, you'd better not be caught drinking alone with this thing — or people will think you're the one with the problem.
It's always classier to show up with a bottle of wine draped in some vino-specific carrier than to brown bag it like the homeless guy down the street. The Built Origami Wine Tote ($25) lets you do exactly that, without needing to carry some bulky thing home. Thanks to its unique design, it collapses down flat after use and is secured by the handle, making it easy to shove into a bag for the ride home. Available in black or the obvious dep red "Bordeaux".
Let's see... how do we like our beer? Cold? Fresh? Carbonated? The Drink Tanks Growler ($65 and up) is designed to ensure all three. Crafted from lightweight, doubled-walled stainless steel, it's designed with a cap and bale sealing system that keeps your brew fresh and cold. As for the latter part, it also plays nice with a $30 keg tap cap lid that locks in place of the standard lid, and offers a place to inject CO2, a release valve to prevent overfilling, and a tap hose that lets the whole thing serve as a portable keg. If that sounds familiar, it probably should — but just remember that your current growler probably isn't made to keep beer cold, so if that's something that you're searching for, this is certainly worth a look.
Tired of your growlers going flat before you have a chance to finish them? Well then drink faster! Just kidding — you should look into a TapIt Cap ($45). This clever new gadget fits over your growler's opening, ensuring that the beer in your growler stays fresh, carbonated, and ready to drink. Thanks to a slot that accepts standard-sized CO2 canisters and a built-in tap and tap handle, it turns your growler into a handheld keg and tap, perfect for barbecues, social gatherings, or anytime you want fresh, draught craft beer.
Liven up your next gathering by letting Bartendro ($500-$2,500) take care of your drinks. Available in models with 3, 7, or 15 dispensers, this Raspberry Pi-powered gadget lets you hook the dispensers to various juices and liquors, then choose a drink you'd like to make out of them from your tablet or smartphone. The desired specifcations are sent over Wi-Fi to the machine, which uses peristaltic pumps to precisely dispense the ingredients that are then mixed and dropped into your glass. Prefer to keep things simple? $300 will buy you the same tech in a single Shotbot.
In one of the greater collaborations in recent memory, legendary scotch makers The Macallan have joined teams with sunglass-makers Oakley, and the result is one hardcore flask. Indeed, the The Macallan x Oakley Flask (£600; roughly $900) draws upon the latter's experience in creating high-end metal objects, with a dark design that brings together food-grade steel, carbon fiber, and aerospace-grade aluminum. Features include a rubberized bottom to keep it from sliding around, a double-sprung cap, and a machined aluminum funnel that threads into the mouthpiece and sports a small air vent on the side. Sure, it's expensive, but so is 25-year-old Macallan.
Replace your boring, plain ice cubes and add a touch of morbid flair to your next drinking session with this Skull Ice Cube Mold ($12). Made of plastic, you simply fill the mold with water, freeze it, and open to remove the cube, which is a lot more multi-faceted/artsy than it is realistic/gross. Which is a good thing, unless you're looking to creep out some Halloween guests later this year.
Let's face it: slamming shots of tequila isn't exactly the classiest of moves. But you can add a bit of respectability back to the proceedings with the Tequila Buffet ($90). It's handmade from wormy chestnut salvaged from Appalachian barns and homes, and features a depression cut to fit a pint of Patron, four depressions to hold the included shot glasses, a cutting board, an included paring knife, salt bowls, and dedicated notches to keep your limes from rolling away. All you need is tequila, a few limes, and some time to kill.
Most gadgets that open bottles see the opener added on to the end as an afterthought — but not the Bottle Grenade ($25). Instead, this aluminum tool was designed as a bottle opener first and foremost — for both twist and pop tops — and had additional functionality added later. Functionality like a 1/4" hex, a 7/16" hex, an integrated hook for hanging on a belt loop, and a perfectly-sized twist slot that will hold a cap backwards the whole day, letting you proudly display your affinity for PBR.
Take the bar with you with the Tumi Mixology Set ($3,995). This limited-edition pack was created in collaboration with Ketel One vodka, and includes a stylish, tall black rectangular case, a shaker, tools, martini glasses, and fold-out storage areas on either side, for vodka, we're assuming. Coming soon.
Tired of drinking from pint glasses, flasks, or — god forbid — gold chalices? Try out the Das Horn ($35). Made from BPA-free ABS plastic with a stainless steel rim, this legendary drinking vessel holds up to 24 oz. of your favorite hooch and makes you look like a viking conqueror without all the "I'm drinking out of an elephant/mammoth tusk" guilt.