Mortlach 70
If you don't mind spending your child's college tuition fund on a single bottle of scotch, you might need help, and you'll no doubt be interested in Mortlach 70 (£10,000; roughly $15,200). Distilled in 1938 — before most of our parents were even born — the world's oldest whisky is surprisingly spry, with a slightly sweet start, a long finish, and notes of dried fig and smoky tobacco throughout. Plus, it comes in a display-worthy package, so you can show off your liquor lunacy to friends, family, and psychiatric professionals.
