Readyman Survival Cards
You don't need to explain how you got into this mess — you just need to get out of it, and quickly. Since you're tied up and handcuffed (but not in the fun kind of way), you'll need to somehow reach for the Hostage Escape Card in your pocket. The stainless steel card provides a lock pick, handcuff shim, tension wrench, saw, and rake to defeat various means of restraint, including zip ties, ropes, and duck tape. Once you've broken free, the Wilderness Survival Card will provide you with tools for defending yourself and catching fish or hunting game, along with sewing needles to stitch up any wounds collected during your escape. Various arrowheads, fish hooks, saws, snare locks, and a set of tweezers provide the means to stick it out in the wild until you're back to civilization. Both cards weigh less than half an ounce and fit in a wallet, measuring just 2" x 3.5".