Sex Panther Cologne

While we can't officially comment on the amount of real panther bits contained in Sex Panther Cologne ($35), we can tell you that 60 percent of the time, it works every time — but you already knew that. So, if your perfectly-groomed caterpillar mustache and red polyester suit aren't quite attracting the attention you crave, it might be time to consider a bolder tack. This officially-licensed Anchorman cologne is truly the stuff of legends, and is meant for only the manliest of men (the kind of men who play jazz flute and fearlessly face a full-grown bear, head on). If that's not you, it might be best to leave this stuff for the real men.

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