Cupcakes are like chick flicks with Reese Witherspoon — nearly every guy likes them but none of us want to admit it. Butch Bakery Cupcakes ($18-$50) are tasty treats you don't have to be ashamed of loving, with camo, wood grain, houndstooth, plaid, checkerboard, or marble chocolate discs on top instead of sissified sprinkles. [Thanks, Anthony]
Zesty, bold, and unexpected — and that's just the included fake mustache. Sazon Mas Guapo ($10) is a spice blend that falls somewhere between a dry rub and seasoning salt, and promises to make "any chef seem more handsome," while also making your food "more better."
AirPods are great, As a result, they're also becoming increasingly ubiquitous. The Nomad AirPod Rugged Case protects their charging case while also giving it a unique look. Its two-piece construction incorporates a black polycarbonate shell and brown, USA-sourced Horween leather, giving the little white capsule a whole different personality. As a bonus, it will wear and develop its own patina over time, making it a great combination for a leather iPhone case. The cases now support AirPods wireless charging.
Protecting your property shouldn't involve drilling holes and running wires. The Simplisafe Home Security System requires none of the above, and is easy to install yourself. It starts with a home base that connects to their service via WiFi with a backup cellular connection for emergencies. You can arm and disarm it from the keypad, with a key fob, or with your phone. Add on as many entry, motion, smoke, glass break, and CO sensors as you need — the system is easily expandable to fit your needs, and comes with the assurance of 24/7 monitoring.
Presented by SimpliSafe.
As seen in Uncrate Issue 04.
Just like regular soda, somewhere along the line ketchup — even name brand stuff like Heinz — went from being natural mixes to scary, high fructose corn syrup-filled goo. Sir Kensington's Gourmet Scooping Ketchup ($7) is out to rectify this situation, with two recipes (original and spiced) containing high-quality, all natural ingredients, and with a taste so refined that it demands to be scooped, not poured, squeezed, or shot out of a Super Soaker.
With a name like Chocomize ($6), you might think about a service that lets you customize your chocolate bars. And you'd be correct. Pick your chocolate bark base and add more than 100 different kinds of fruits, nuts, herbs, and candies, or simply select from one of the company's best-selling bars, like the Smores Bar with graham teddies and mini-marshmallows, the Candy Bar with gummi bears, chocolate candy, and Nerds, or the Spicy Special Bar with black peppercorns, mini chipotles, and cayenne pepper.
With a clean, minimalist design, the Status Audio BT One Wireless Headphones look as good as the music coming out of them sounds. Their timeless appeal is created by a slim silhouette, free of any unnecessary logos or embellishments. The battery keeps the premium audio flowing for up to 30 hours while the quick-pairing Bluetooth 5.0 gives you mobile freedom. Available in JetBlack or Umber.
Presented by Status Audio.
Truly wireless with a handcrafted tortoise brown acetate body, the MW07 earphones from Master & Dynamic strike an ideal blend of convenience, performance, and style. Inside each 'bud is a custom 10mm Beryllium driver that delivers impossibly good sound from a small package. Silicone "wings" in two different sizes ensure a secure fit, and MEMS mics let you handle calls easily. They last for 3.5 hours, charge inside the included stainless steel carrying case for a total of 14 hours of battery life, and have an IPX 4 splashproof rating, making them capable, although unlikely, gym companions.
Available in Matte Black or Tortoise Shell.
Dimensions (Earphones): 0.98" x 0.87" x 1.11" / Dimensions (Case): 2.54" x 1.06" x 1.78" / Weight (Earphone, each): 0.32 oz / Weight (Case): 2.68 oz / Wireless: Bluetooth 4.2 with apt-X / Connectivity Distance: 65+ feet
Specially selected for its robust qualities, Grill Honey ($12) is ready to take on the flames at your next BBQ. It's 100% pure raw and KSA Kosher Certified, and is a great way to add a little sweet zing to your grilled meat, poultry, seafood, or vegetable dishes, without the need for heavy, artificial spreads or marinades.
Aside from Elvis, BBQ is arguably Memphis' most famous export, and you won't find a better example than Corky's BBQ ($15-$270). This Mid-South staple is available online in sauce form, but if you're wanting to skip the cooking and go straight to chowing down, you can order ready to reheat ribs, chicken, pork, or beef, either by itself or accompanied by beans and even pecan pies. No word on whether bibs are also included, but you might want some around just in case.