Your Only Job Is Watching Football
Rest easy all you wall-burrowing critters, Monday Night Football is coming September 12.
Rest easy all you wall-burrowing critters, Monday Night Football is coming September 12.
Duck Brand's showing who's the MCP of the duct tape mainframe.
Like a good neighbor State Farm is there, with an Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Low-calorie and alcohol-free, Five's Infuzed THC Seltzers let you unwind with no regrets. They're designed to replace traditional booze, with 2mg of delta-9 THC, 2mg of CBD, and additional cannabinoids to deliver good vibes with every sip. The buzz will begin in under 15 minutes, and because it's plant-powered, you can relax and enjoy the ride without worrying about the hangover that inevitably follows. Naturally flavored in Black Cherry, Grapefruit, and Guava Passionfruit, each refreshing can is just 40 calories, allowing you to savor the moment guilt-free.
Presented by Five CBD.
The new elite isn't chasing hype — they're building longevity. From boardrooms to backcountry trails, a rising class of athletes, founders, and performance-first men are rewriting what it means to age well. Leading the charge is Eric Hinman: 5x Ironman, serial entrepreneur, and proof that hustle and recovery aren't opposites — they're partners. JOYMODE delivers KSM-66 Ashwagandha, Longjack, and Boron to support energy, drive, recovery, and resilience. This movement isn't about inflated egos or quick fixes—it's about showing up stronger at 6AM than you did at 26. The game doesn't end at 30. It evolves — and you evolve with it.
Presented by JOYMODE.
Consult a physician before consuming any new supplement. Any health claims made are solely those of the brand and not those of Uncrate LLC.
Wasting water is weird. Not as weird as sitting in a stranger's kitchen wearing jorts and a wife beater featuring a mysterious yellow stain while making offensive noises for the sake of water conservation, but still weird.
Even more strange than his lack of invisibility, Hardee's is selling bologna.
Built for those who wear their legacy as comfortably as their cap, Branded Bills has become a staple for men who merge grit with identity. What started with premium headwear has evolved into a full collection of purpose-driven gear — crafted to handle early mornings, late nights, and everything in between. Every piece, from their Signature Series hats to all-season outerwear, carries a tailored ruggedness that works just as well on mountain trails as it does at Monday's 9AM. With clean silhouettes, heritage-inspired logos, and materials built to last, Branded Bills outfits a lifestyle where ambition and authenticity intersect.
Presented by Branded Bills.
For the man whose passport sees more stamps than dust, the Jack Archer Jetsetter Shorts are the essential uniform of elevated travel. Crafted with the discerning frequent flyer in mind, these shorts blend tailored aesthetics with ultimate performance. The sculpted waistband lifts with intention and ensures first-class comfort without compromise. Wrinkle-free, odor-resistant, and stain-repellent, they demand nothing and deliver everything. With fabric that adapts to motion and maintains its shape across time zones, the Jetsetter is proof that luxury doesn't pause for laundry. From Santorini to São Paulo, this is how you stay sharp without trying.
Presented by Jack Archer.
Snoop Dogg, Dwight Howard, and Josh Smith make up Adidas' incrowd of originals in their latest commercial.