Carlton Draught Slo-Mo
As the song goes, "Men look much better in slow motion. It makes me want to sing quite loud. Now, I want a Carlton Draught, chips and lasagne."
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Urban Bowling
Nissan hides from the bowling ball apocalypse in this spot for a crossover from across the sea.
Mattel Tommy Gun
This commercial from the 50's/60's shows how awesome kids toys used to be. The Mattel Tommy Burst Gun sells alone for $3, or as part of Mattel's $7 Tommy Burst Detective Set, which also includes a scarily-realistic snub-nosed 38, along with a snap-draw shoulder holster, wallet, badge, and ID card.
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Caliber Fitness Coaching Program
Caliber is rewriting the playbook on personal training with a science-driven coaching program designed for busy professionals who want real results without wasting time. Caliber pairs each member with an elite coach—only 1 in 100 applicants make the cut—to deliver personalized strength, cardio, and nutrition plans through its powerful app. Members see an average 20% improvement in body composition within 3 months, all for a fraction of the cost of traditional training, starting at $200/month. For September, Caliber is knocking $100 off all coaching plans, making the smartest way to get in shape even smarter.
Presented by Caliber.
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Hisense 65" Class U7 Series TV
The Hisense U7 Series 65" Mini-LED QLED 4K Google TV packs big-screen punch into a sleek frame—boasting Mini-LED Pro backlighting, QLED color, and a native 144 Hz refresh rate for gaming-level responsiveness. It supports Dolby Vision, HDR10+, and includes a NEXTGEN ATSC 3.0 tuner and Wi-Fi 6E for future-proof connectivity. Designed for sports, movies, and next-gen gaming alike, it delivers flagship-level performance at a far more approachable price.
Presented by Hisense.
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That's How You Do It, Smooth Pants
Mmm... giant sexy chocolate bar.
What It Isn't
These Dodge Charger commercials that make me feel like a girly girl really make me want to buy a charger.
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Dreame Aqua10 Ultra Roller Robot Vacuum
When it comes to cleaning hard floors, vacuuming is only half the equation — they need to be mopped too. Dreame's Aqua10 Ultra can handle both. It has an AI-powered navigation system that maps and avoids obstacles with precision, while FlexRise suspension clears thresholds and carpets up to 3.15 inches without slowing down. Voice control lets you prioritize carpets or boost suction on command, and—when the job's done—it returns to its dock to empty waste, sanitize, dry the roller, and refill with water and cleaning solution. As a result, it can handle up to 100 days of cleaning without intervention, making it ideal for busy lifestyles.
Presented by Dreame.
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HairMax LaserBand 82 Device
HairMax's LaserBand 82 ComfortFlex takes a clinical approach to restoring fuller, healthier hair with real medical-grade lasers. Delivering 1,230mW of therapeutic light energy directly to the scalp, it stimulates follicles to reverse thinning, restart natural growth cycles, and increase density over time. A flexible band design and soft-touch teeth keep treatments comfortable, while its proven red light therapy tech makes it one of the most efficient at-home solutions for tackling hair loss. Use code QCU3R818 for 10% off.
Presented by Hairmax.
Consult a physician before use. Any health claims made are solely those of the brand and not those of Uncrate LLC.
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The Letter
Volkswagen helps end the suspicions of one man.
Is It Monday Yet?
Only three more Mondays until Gruden starts his new season of brown nosing above the gridiron.
